Freak Out Moments











{April 17, 2014}   Mass Media and Cosplay

WOW! I am so proud to say that I know people that have been on the TV or in Magazines etc with their talents. It’s amazing to see those wonderful talents getting a spot light but I also know it comes with reservations.

I’d like to explain why I don’t think it’s a media issue as such, but more about how you take it as a person when you see it. So I am going to pick the Fur And Loathing episode of CSI, Season 4 saw the “murder of a furry” with it came a lot of jokes about the weird things people do, they covered as much of the culture in the 40 ish minutes they had and rightly, or wrongly, most likely missed what those in the community saw as the “real deal”.

If I am honest I had never even heard of the community before that show aired, and it didn’t make me shy away going OMG bunch of Freaks! What it actually had me do was look at the culture, I thought wow, well it’s like any fetish isn’t it? Good and bad sides for all. You get a good and a bad egg in anything you do, anywhere you go. It’s not unusual either for the media to try and cover something and abysmally muck it up but at least I thought about looking more into that culture and now I have furry friends, and I have a better understanding by asking them about it.

To me that is the same for Cosplay, gaming or anything that other people don’t get. If someone says “you’re into all that weird stuff” ask them what is weird about it? Didn’t they go to their friends stag do in a dress with a comedy wig? Haven’t they played cops/robbers or cowboys./indians as a kid and got delight out of that few pounds costume? It’s the same thing only at the cosplayer level you get everything from the off the shelf fun, the few quid ones you made, and the massively pricey ones. Either way that person is having a good time right?

Well here’s where I think it’s dangerous and it’s not about you, me or the media. It’s when you listen to that media and take it’s ONE slant as gospel. You take that comment one guy makes from a ten second clip saying “oh I think all cosplayers are a bit mental” but I bet you they could easily have shaved off that bit after where the guy could be laughing saying “and i am utterly mental, this sounds brilliant. Sign me up”… it’s not necessarily the view they gave it’s how the media cut and portray it when they want to take their slant one way or another.

This is the bit that I also find dangerous, when I was 15/18 I was a singer and I travelled around, I sang in pubs, clubs and all over. I loved the performing aspect I hated the industry with a passion that I cannot explain in words. Why?

Let me summarise where many of my own problems about my appearance. confidence and troubles stopped me from going on with that career…

I was physically assaulted at school for being short, tall, thin, fat, spotty, glasses, no glasses, having horses, not having the same blazer, using a biro not the same pen as was in fashion. Name your theme, they did it, they hurt and I was not backed up by the school despite my mother’s sincerest attempts. In the end we moved but the school had been less than useful.

When applying for any part/spot in a performance: too fat, too thin, eyes wrong colour, height, need to shave her hips on one side, her knee isn’t quite the right shape for a ballet career. What her skill? Oh yeah brush that side, boobs? No boobs? Either way they have faults they want to project on to you yet seldom praise your talent.

What does all of this do? I went from barely eating and dancing most hours of a day to crying, depression and binge eating. You can tell me I should smarten up, and that these people shouldn’t affect you but the second you become passionate you open yourselves up to both sides. Positive and negative.

I am 34 as I write this, it’s taken all those years to get back to a place where it is okay to have my picture taken, to dance without a care, to sing in the shower and have a laugh. And I can’t say that the media or anyone helped that, it was the network of support, friends and being able to hear that others had come out the other side.

So to all those that worry about these things, yes you will worry, but don’t fall into the trap of letting it destroy that smile, crooked or otherwise that is the essence of beauty isn’t it? Loving yourself and loving those who see you for who you are.

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